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Previously on Gilmore Girls.

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- Oh, my God, I'm going to Chilton?
- You did it, babe. You got in.

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- I told Mom you're changing schools.
- Is she thrilled?

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The party's on Friday.

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Are you moving?

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No, just my books are.

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- Ready?
- Yes.

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Headmaster Charleston will see you.

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You may have been the smartest
at Stars Hollow, but it's different here.

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You'll never catch up,
and you'll never beat me.

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There's a good chance you will fail.

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- Who's that?
- New girl.

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Stay out of my way.
I will make this school a living hell for you.

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See you tomorrow, Mary.

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- They kept calling me Mary.
- Mary, like Virgin Mary.

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What if I had looked like a slut?

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They might have added
a "Magdalene" to it.

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- Shopping for school supplies. Party.
- Nobody demanded that you come.

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Are you kidding?
How often do you do things like this?

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While we're going crazy,
we should get toilet paper and a plunger.

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I'll do this later.

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- No, I'm teasing. Get that list of yours.
- Okay.

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- I need legal pads...
- Got it.

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...tons of pens, some number 2 pencils,
three highlighters, an eraser...

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a staple remover, and a folder.

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- You need three highlighters?
- Yes.

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- That's a very random number.
- It is not random.

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How did you get to the number three?

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One dries up, one gets lost, I have one left.

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- You've really thought this out.
- Yes.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg?

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- Can we get back to the list?
- All right. Hey, legal pads.

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- No. Those are purple.
- Yes. Purple is festive.

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- I can't have purple.
- You can. They're on sale.

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I'm going to a serious school.
I need serious paper.

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- Paper is paper.
- Not at Chilton.

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- All right, fine. Here's your serious paper.
- Thank you.

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And here are your somber highlighters,
your maudlin pencils...

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- your manic-depressive pens.
- Mom.

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These erasers are on lithium.
So they seem cheerful...

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but we caught them trying to
shove themselves in the pencil sharpener.

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- I'm going home.

[...]
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