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Once upon a time in New York,
there was a cop named Charlie.

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He was a very decent guy,
as was his partner, Bo.

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He was a good listener.

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He loved kids.

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He had patience
and common sense.

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He was resourceful.

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Okay people, let's go.
Step lively now, come on.

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He was just a good cop.

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Charlie lived happily in Queens,
where he was born and grew up.

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- Yo, CharlieΞ
- JesuΞ

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- Kill anybody todayΠ
- Didn't even wound anybody.

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- You won't see your wifeΠ
- I mustn't surprise her at work.

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Charlie was married to Muriel.
She hated Queens.

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If he was a detective,
he'd have decent clothes.

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- But he's got to wear the uniform.
- I feel for you. You have ambition.

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I never pushed him enough.

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If he was on the take,
I'd say, "He has initiativeΞ"

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My sister was married to a cop.
It's a no-win situation.

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Either they're honest and broke,
or crooks that never come home.

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What did she doΠ

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She left him and married an
electrician. That's real money.

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I'm running out of patience.
I'm a person who needs money.

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And then there's Yvonne, a waitress,
who gets some terrible news.

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Miss Biasi, it says here that you
owe ¤12,000 on your MasterCard.

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Those charges were incurred by my
ex-husband, after I threw him out.

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The bank is not aware
of your divorce.

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We're not divorced yet, but I told
him to tear up the credit cards.

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If you're not divorced yet, you're
liable for your husband's debts.

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I'm divorced in my heart.
That's what counts.

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Legally, that's not what counts.

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Do you know how much it costsΠ
Have you ever been divorcedΠ

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Probably not. Probably you've
had good luck your entire life.

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Which is the opposite of me.

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If the MasterCard is in your name,
it's your responsibility.

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Listen, please. I came to New York
five years ago, to be an actress.

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I was in "Our Town". I played Emily.
People cried buckets.

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- I'm sure they were.
- Will there be anything elseΠ

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So I come to New York,
and I meet Eddie.

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Talk about the worst luck of allΞ
He swept me off my fee
[...]
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