Preview Subtitle for The Beverly Hillbillies


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- I swear, if'n you don't
learn to share this honey...

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I'm gonna give you a real whuppin:

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Now go on!

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- Is the doctor in?
- No doubt about it.


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- What's ailin' ya, Fat Elmer?
- I et too much cheese.

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Now I can't burp.

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Can ya fix me, Granny?

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Dang.

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Before I sign anything...

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I want to know how much money
we're talkin' about.

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Mr. Clampett, there's more petroleum
in your swamp...

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than there is in all of Kuwait.

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- That bad, huh?
- Mr. Clampett...

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you are sitting on the biggest
domestic oil strike in history.

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And when you sign these contracts,
we're going to pay you one billion dollars.


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Do you have anybody
who can advise you on these contracts?

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Cousin jethro's a-comin'tomorrow night
for Sunday supper, Pa.


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He's the one with the learnin'.
He went to school at Oxford.

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- Jethro.
- Yes, Ma?

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Did you fix those bare-as-bones brakes
like I told you?

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Of course.
I pulled 'em off yesterday.

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The new ones are
comin' in the mail next week.

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- Jethro!
- Howdy, Granny.

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Oh! You dadblamed
simpleminded yahoo!

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Your crack-bucket head's
emptier than last year's bird's nest.

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If your head was filled with dynamite...

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- Ow! Ow!
- You wouldn't know how to blow your nose!

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- You...
- Ow!

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- Granny! Ow! Granny!
- Just get out of my sight!

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Now, jedediah...

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you're fixin' to be the richest man
in this here county.

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Look at how you live. Why, your land's
overrun with snakes and skunks.

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You got no TV, no telephone and no radio.

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You're right, Pearl.
We are a-livin'in paradise.


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No, Jed!
Paradise is someplace like...

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Beverly Hills, Californy.

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- They got swimmin'pools.
- Mm-hmm.


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- And movie stars.
- And smog.

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What's a smog?

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I reckon it's a small hog.

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Now, if you're not gonna think about yourself,
think about your daughter.


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You need to get remarried, jed,
and she needs
[...]
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