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So, this chick and I are going at it

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behind the Central Park Zoo.

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The Bonobo chimps start
giving us a standing O,

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and just when I'm about to
give her the same thing...

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What up?... I...

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I can't.

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I just... I can't.

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Guys, I know you count the
minutes until you can escape

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from your humdrum lives by
hearing how awesome mine is,

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and I love doing that for you,
but I just can't tonight.

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- What's wrong?
- I don't want to talk about it.

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Okay. Hey, you guys see
Deadliest Catch last night?

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Did I ever!

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Deadliest Catch ever!

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All right, I'll tell you!

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My mother is selling
the house I grew up in.

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All of my childhood memories
gone, just like that!

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That sucks.

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I've been there, buddy.

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What are you talking about?

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Your mother still lives in
the house you grew up in.

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With her new hippie husband, Clint.

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The comfort of home is a little ruined

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when someone turns your old room

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into what I'm pretty sure is
a Tantric sex temple.

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With all the bamboo,
pot smoke and '60s music,

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it's like my old G.I. Joes are frozen in

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some weird Vietnam flashback.

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Anyway, I need you guys to come out

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to Staten Island on Saturday
and help box everything up.

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You expect us to spend a whole day

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packing up your mom's house?

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Of course not.

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It's a two-day job.

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Pass.

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Same.

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Unsubscribe.

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You guys are adorable.

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You seriously believe
that I, Barney Stinson,

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can't talk you into this?

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I got the Queen to give me a fist bump.

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No one believes that story.

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You may be able to talk the brain surgeons

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you pick up into doingwhatever you want,

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but it's not gonna work on us.

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How did he do that?

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So there we were helping
Barney pack up his childhood home.

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[...]
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