Preview Subtitle for How S Your Father


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There is something
I wish my dad had told me.


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The longest pause you will ever
experience in your life

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is the one that follows asking
the question...

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Will you marry meΠ

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Your brain goes into overdrive,

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imagining every
possible response.

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No.

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Oh, God, no.

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(laughing)

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(snorts)Ψ
You want me to marry...

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No.

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Oh, I'm sorry, Ted.
I can't.

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Mark Johnson,
the quarterback

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from your high school football
team, already asked me.

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What's up, TurdΠ

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It's TedΞ

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But if you're lucky,
she may answer with the single

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greatest word
in the English language.

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Yes.

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Stella and I spent that summer
happily engaged.

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Marshall was still coping
with unemployment.

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What are you doingΠ

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Lily threw herself
into her painting.

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What are you doingΠ

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Barney was rehabilitating
from his bus accident.

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What are you doingΠ

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And well, Marshall just kept

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coping with unemployment.

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What are you doingΠ

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And Robin
continued to uphold

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the high journalistic standards
of Metro News 1.

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Is your favorite
brand of dental floss

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poisoning your entire familyΠ

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Tune in at 11Ψ00
for the shocking... tooth.

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Okay, I officially
hate my job.

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I'm not a reporter,
I'm just someone

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who shows up at night
and scares people.

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I'm the bogeyman
with a teleprompter.

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(laughing)

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"Bogeyman
with a teleprompter."

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That's hilariousΞ
Great joke,

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Robin, great joke.

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Barney, no offense
to Robin,

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but that wasn't
that funny.

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Are you kiddingΠ
That was a great joke.

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It's smart, funny, beautiful,
the whole package.

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It's everything you're
afraid to let yourself want.

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[...]
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