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1
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My mother has been FREAKING OUT.

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I wonder how many of these videos
will start with that exact same sentence.

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So what was she freaking out about?
That Jane has to default

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on her student loans again even though
she has a full-time job? Nope.

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Or the fact that I have midterms coming up

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that will probably shape
my entire future? Not even close.

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No. My mom freaks out about Bing Lee.

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Some rich, successful going-to-be-a-doctor
who she's never met,

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who's apparently destined
to marry one of her daughters.

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My name is Lizzie Bennet
and this is all about Bing Lee.

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According to the news,
aka 2.5 WPF social media chatter,

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the mysterious Mr. Bing Lee is currently
being whisked away to the airport by his driver.

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His driver. He has a driver. I wish
I had a driver. That would be AWESOME.

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As I was saying, Bing Lee is currently
on his way to the airport

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to return with an entire harem of women.
According to my mother.

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Five hundred women!
There are prostitutes and teenagers

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and probably not-so-distant cousins!
- And you want me to marry this guy?

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Have you not been listening to me?
He's rich, handsome, and single!

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And what makes you think there are
five hundred teenage prostitutes?

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I just happened to be driving by his house,
you know, five or six times,

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spoken to his neighbors, stolen his mail…
completely normal things!

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- Right. Of course.
- And anyway, you, my dear, are missing the point.

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Those are now five hundred women
with a better chance of marrying that man

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than any of my hopeless,
pathetic, single daughters.

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- Hey!
- Wow, you have seriously lost your mind.

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You do need some man-action.
- Well, you've got plenty to spare.

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Hey. You should be nice to me because
I know something you don't know.

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Wait, Lydia! Wait!

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Okay. Now tell me.

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Oh my God, tell me or get out.
- Okay, so mom paid me ten bucks to drive by Bing's

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on my way home from Marie's
and he only brought back one girl.

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So I talked to Marie, who texted Ben, who called his cousin.
- Lydia!

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She's just his sister. The girl
he brought back, just his sister! Holla!

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Alright, well at least Mom will be thrilled.
So wait, you saw him. Is he actually cute?

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Nah, just the bac
[...]
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